Watching Fox News these days is like being at open-mic night at a marginal comedy club.
Rightwing pundits, like a lineup of amateur comics, are trying out their new material and hoping it kills. So far, not so much.
Take Jesse Watters (please). The primetime successor to Tucker Carlson was grasping at straws - yes, literal straws - the other day as he looked for a way to put down Tim Walz. How best to mock the popular Minnesota governor who is Kamala Harris's running mate?
"Women love masculinity and women do not like Tim Walz, so that should just tell you about how masculine Tim Walz is," Watters said on the roundtable talk show he co-hosts, The Five.
With that setup, he tried to prove his point.
"The other day you saw him with a vanilla ice-cream shake. Had a straw in it. Again, that tells you everything."
The joke, or whatever it was, didn't really land. Most people know that Walz is the opposite of a wimp. He's a famously regular guy - America's dad - who will use his newfound power to demand that all Americans own jumper cables and know how to use them.
The straw-grasping is getting a little desperate these days as Harris and Walz spread their forward-looking message, and as their rivals - the felon and adjudicated sex offender Donald Trump and his running mate, JD Vance - prove themselves less appealing by the day.
"Fox is really feeling the loss of Tucker Carlson right now," theorized Matt Gertz, a senior fellow at Media Matters, the progressive media-watchdog non-profit, who watches a lot of rightwing cable news as part of his job.
"He was very effective at lifting something from the rightwing fever swamp and making it into a coherent message" that could spread through the conservative ecosystem.
Failing Tucker's contributions to the commonweal, Fox and its pundits are floundering. They keep trying new approaches to replace their well-honed attacks on Biden - his family's supposed corruption ("Biden crime family") and his age ("senile").
Over the past week, Fox tried to gin up controversy over Harris's "code-switching" - the use of a different accent or speaking style when speaking to Black audiences. Fox's White House correspondent Peter Doocy pressed the question at an official press briefing.
"Since when does the vice-president have what sounds like a southern accent?" Doocy demanded. The press secretary, Karine Jean-Pierre, dismissed him and moved on after posing a query of her own: "Do you think Americans seriously think this is an important question?"
Maria Bartiromo focused on this "southern accent" scandal on her Fox Business show, using a clip of Harris speaking to an audience in Detroit about how unions have helped win benefits for all Americans, like paid sick leave and a five-day work week, by repeating the phrase: "You'd better thank a union member."
The pro-Trump cable network didn't help its own cause with that one. "The funny thing about Fox News being mad at Harris for code-switching," one observer noted on X, "is they had to play the clip of her talking about how great unions are over and over again." You can't buy that kind of media exposure.
The well-circulated photograph of Tim Walz's family members wearing pro-Trump T-shirts fizzled, too, though it got a good ride on Fox for a day or two. Soon enough, it became clear that these were mostly distant cousins, a Nebraska branch of the family. Walz's sister told the Associated Press she didn't even recognize them. Walz does have an older brother who favors Trump, but most Americans are familiar with family disputes over politics.
Gertz told me that Fox pundits were sent reeling by Harris's ascension and are "very shook by the 'weird' narrative" that Tim Walz has popularized. That's the idea that Trump, Vance and their ilk are deeply strange people - way out of the mainstream with their nasty putdowns of "childless cat ladies" and their outlandish conspiracy theories. It applies all too well to the Fox personalities as well as the politicians they promote.
There's time, of course, for Fox to come up with an effective message. Until something hits, we're going to see a lot of painful tryouts.
The alternative, of course, is obvious: just don't turn it on.
